You can call it a story, or a journey, a path i have even heard it called before. Whatever you want to call this thing called life is about as easy as pulling nails out of a 2*4 with you’re bare hands. It’s hard and difficult sometimes the things we find happening in our lives, that we just sit back and scratch our heads.
Well i like to call it a journey if you don’t mind because that’s what i feel every morning when i wake up and thank God for another day. Ya see it all started about 7 years ago when i fell face down on an icy road in the middle of the night and just gave up. Thankfully there wasn’t any cars coming at the time! I’m a recovering alcoholic with a little over 7 years of sobriety, and i know just as much now as i did then.
I by no means am writing this for any other reason to share my experiences and just maybe save a life. I know when i fell down, in the middle of a busy road, it saved my life, because that was the very first time i ever called out to God, sincerely asking for help. The year was 2004 in late January and i was on my way home from another drinking extravaganza when i got home, i realized that hours before, i got tossed out of my apartment(yup, that really sucked!).
So what does any good drunk do? I break in to my own apartment!!! Yup, thats right, i broke in to a place where i used to live, just to sleep off the booze and then head out the next morning in search of a place to lay my head down. Unfortunatly, before i past out, the cops were standing in my room ready to take me on to the county hotel for a while. However, by a graciouse ex-lanlord, he didn’t want to press charges, he just wanted me out. So the cops gave me a ride to the city line and then told me i was on my own.
Now that was the first time i had been on my own in a long time. I thought i could handle it, get to the hotel, pass out, go to work the next morning, and do it all over again, right? Well i started the walk and i got about half way there and i found myself starting to slip. “oh no!” i thought then SMACK!! Right into the ice covered road. That hurt! Especially when youre drunk! I layed their for a few moments, and in all honestly i was hoping for a truck or a car to come along and “not see” me and just take me out. I was done.
Tears welled up in my eyes as i pondered the silience of that cold january morning. My mind was racing and all i saw was flashes of failures and disapointments. everything i ever attempted to do i failed at and i figured the world would be better without me. In one loud cry i called out to God that if he was there that i needed help and now!!
Well thats half the story folks, as you can see im alive and well, and yes God did hear my crys, but thats all i have for tonight. I do hope that by reading my blogs and stories it gives someone, somewhere, just a little hope.