When i was disecting the night and running with the wind i was the man. I was the one everyone wanted to be around at the party. I was a happy drunk singing a top of the world and drowning in fear. Fear lived in me more than alcohol. Everything I did was fear based and and I had no escape. Running with the people i ran with and doing the things i was doing, made me feel like the Alpha for a limited time, but when the booze ran out and the woman left, all that was left was me.
This nagging feeling in my gut that I was always doing something wrong was always there. I could never shake it, never get rid of it, until I starting my nightly routine of debacary and dinning, sweet romance and everlasting nothings. I ran from this feeling for so long that it was becoming apart of my life. It was like my worst best friend telling me once again, its ok. When all the while i knew it wasn’t ok. In fact evrything i was doing was down right dispicable.
When I drew a sober breath and started to get some sort of sense about things, my sponsor took me to a meeting and the topic of the evening was FEAR. I really felt a little uncomfartable because this was something I knew all to well. One of the guys in the meeting broke it down into this acronym, Face Everything And Recover. Which when i thought about it, it really made a lot of sense. I had to basically Face my Giants. “Great” i thought to myself. All the years of hard living had to be dealt with and i knew it. I did it, and still continue to this day.
What I have learned over several years is fear is lack of faith. Period. Theres no other way to describe it. Basically edging God out and going at it alone. I know when i do this in my own life, im basically telling God, “I got this”. Sad isn’t it. This is the devils way of attacking us is wth fear. He tells us that were not good enough, or not talented enough, or not pretty enough to be a success. All the while God is telling us to stand strong in Him and he’ll take care of it. Why are we humans so prone to doing what the devil wants, and not what God wants? Fear. That one little word that drives this world to the max. This one little word has brought down countries, noble men and woman, sucessful buissnesses and the like.
Scripture tells us “to fear the Lord” and thats what I choose to do today. Today I choose to Fear the Lord with all my heart and soul because when i fear the Lord, I know im doing right. I know that i am confident when i fear the Lord and all my dreams are in Him and only Him.
So let me ask you my friend, who do you FEAR today? Thanks for reading!! Be Blessed!
- 2012 – The Fear Of The Lord Returns
- Conquer Your Fear
- Conquer Your Fear
- The Devil is the father of lies, even the ones we tell ourselves!